My Little Obsessions

Gustave Courbet "Two Girls on the Banks of the Seine"

Eugene Delacroix "Liberty Leading the People"

Jacques-Louis David "Death of Marat"

Jean Honore Fragonard "The Swing"

Caravaggio "The Supper at Emmaus"

Parmigianino "Madonna dal Collo Longo"

Titian "Venus of Urbino"

Mary Cassatt "The Letter"

J.M.W. Turner "Snow Storm: Steam-Boat off a Harbour's Mouth"

Andrew Wyeth "Christina's World"

Redon Odilon "Roger and Angelica"

Pieter Paul Rubens

John Constable "The Glebe Farm"

Caspar David Friedrich "The Wreck of the Hope"

Jan van Eyck "The Virgin with the Canon van der Paele"

Jan van Eyck "Giovanni Arnolfini and His Bride"

Caravaggio "The Sacrifice of Isaac"

Pablo Picasso "Girl before a Mirror"

Franz Kline "New York, New York"

Vincent van Gogh "Fishing Boats at Sea"

Rembrandt van Rijin "The Artist in His Studio"

Gustave Courbet "Studio of a Painter: A Real Allegory Summarizing My Seven Years of Life as an Artist"

Pierre-Auguste Renoir

Willem de Kooning "Woman and Bicycle"

Frida Kahlo "The Little Deer"

Hello lovelies. I'm blogging again. After many months.

I hope this goes well, I want to write a lot more this summer, and of course, I'd love to hear all your thoughts and comments, whoever you are. 

Summer is here. I sat out on my lawn chair with my wet hair and the birds at the birdfeeder. It was so calm.

The birds would chase themselves around the feeder so elegantly. I could watch them all day. 

It is my last week of school. It went by so slowly today. My last Monday of High School. 

My mind is sluggish tonight as I pound out these words. I wish you all could read them as a personally written letter. 

Just pretend it is. 

Otto Bear is sighing. I feel the same. The day has gone so slowly, edging on like a anticipating drop of water. My eyes are tired. Tomorrow will be better. Promise. 

Hopes of better days right?

I'm going to grow up slowly. I'm going to take my time.

I officially decided I need these shoes.

 I have been looking for things that inspire me. I have gathered websites, pictures and sayings. Here are a few things that I have found and very much enjoyed. 

www.lookbook.nu

www.modcloth.com

www.urbanoutfitters.com

www.lulus.com

www.themayfly.com/weblog/

www.delias.com

www.tomsshoes.com

Rubbing my face.

Head pounding.

Another sleepless night.

All is so quiet.

Abnormal.

My thoughts, so overwhelming. The blank book and pen in my cold bedroom await me. It's so damn cold. I'm becoming my own best friend these cold nights. The hushed voice of Billy Corgan feels comforting. 

Stream of thought.

Denial in all it's forms have become a part of my daily life. Am I just another shot down bird? Unwanted in all forms? 

No no. 

I am fine the way I am. Happy and alone. Truthfully. Love will come when it will. Patiently I will wait. Hopefully.

Distant highways call my name. Whispering softly in my ear, around my neck, giving me chills. Every day, every single day this thought, comes into my mind. The desert calls. An obsession? No, a home. I am homesick. For the place I was born. Where I roughed my heels and fingertips. Boulders became simple stones and worn friends as I battled my way up them. Defying odds. Feeling my skin on those boulders made me feel alive. Their ancient skin, my immature skin. Contact of different nature. I miss climbing. The slow motion chalk dust. Hands so tired, achy limbs becoming limp and happy. Genuine smiles, sitting under bushes looking up at the grand kings and queen boulders and cliffs exchanging small conversation, "You wanna hit that one Cal?" "Yeah let's do it." I miss you Reg. My teacher. Tying knots, spending time in July in a bloody hot canyon, dipping our hair in streams. "I have a monkey for a brother!" I yell up at him, neck cramping. The best feeling. Hands, chalked up. Best feeling.

The most beautiful hands in the world.

Trails of thought. 

Time to write. 

So so quiet.

I miss my chalky hands.

Currently listening : 

Adore

By The Smashing Pumpkins

Release date: By 1998-06-02